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We analyzed over 500,000 first contacts on our dating site, Ok Cupid.Our program looked at keywords and phrases, how they affected reply rates, and what trends were statistically significant.The result: a set of rules for what you should and shouldn’t say when introducing yourself. Let’s go: are nice things to say to someone, but no one wants to hear them.
Besides, when you tell a woman she’s beautiful, chances are you’re not.
On the other hand, more general compliments seem to work well: The word is a perfect case study for our point.
As an adjective, it’s a physical compliment, but as an adverb (as in, “I’m pretty good at sports.”) it’s is just another word.
When used as an adverb it actually does very well (a phenomenon we’ll examine in detail below), but as We took a close look at salutations.
It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening. But either way: men should be careful not to let the appearance of vulnerability become the appearance of sweaty desperation: Mentioning your religion helps you, but, paradoxically, it helps you most if you have no religion.